Monday, March 3, 2014

Lemur Housing

There will be a large lemur exhibit housing over 13 different species of lemurs including the Hairy-eared dwarf lemur, the bongolava mouse lemur, the pale fork-marked lemur, and the golden bamboo lemur. These lemurs will be enclosed in a glass dome for their own protection and fed unhealthy amounts of steroids and Monster energy drinks to provide better entertainment. Then every Friday, one child from the Branson school district will be chosen from a lottery jar as tribute, like in the Hunger Games, and will be placed into the glass dome for a period of 3 hours (2-5pm) and surrendered up to the lemurs so that they can have a human dummy to take their energy and anger out on at the end of the week. This will most likely popularize a new hashtag on twitter and instagram: #TGILFF which is an abbreviated form of Thank God It's Lemur Feeding Friday. In turn this would bring thousands of new tourists to Branson, which would in turn boost Branson's economy ten-fold. So people, let's bring the Lemurs to the Branson Roundabout!

- From the Lemur Dreamer